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vlbuehleTitle: Proposals, Blunders, and Happily Ever After
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
vlbuehle
Fandom: Star Trek Reboot
Pairing: Kirk/Bones
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: Not mine, and I make no money off this, dammit. Life would be so much happier if I did.
Prompt: Bones and Kirk are in a serious relationship. It gets to the point where Kirk is comfortable enough to propose to Bones (however anon wishes, private or public), but Bones can't bring himself to say yes. When Kirk asks Bones why, he says that he's afraid Kirk will get tired of him and want a divorce one day, something Bones doesn't want to go through ever again. Kirk does his best to show how much Bones really means to him (again, anon's choice how). Sex is fine, but so is a meaningful bout of dialouge and some kissing.
A/N: Forcymbala ; hopefully this cheers you up a touch.
James T. Kirk stared down at the small box in his drawer--unoriginal, yes, but traditional and at this point he'd take tradition and any luck it might bring. He didn't think Bones would say no, not really; they'd gone through too damn much, and he was pretty sure that if Bones had cared enough to take a risk on the fucked up jackass he'd been, he wasn't going to balk now. Besides, Bones was one of the few people Jim knew who actually believed in the shiny visions of white picket fences and happily ever after. Jim, now, he was a hard nosed realist who'd lost his belief in pretty fairy tales the first time Frank's fists had found his cowering frame. Any lingering belief had died on Tarsus IV--and then he'd met Bones. Bitter, snarky, perpetually cranky Bones who thought hyposprays were instruments of punishment and wielded them accordingly. And somehow along the way Jim had actually found his happily ever after: he had the best crew in the 'verse, he had his beautiful lady, and most importantly of all, he had Bones.
Go figure. Being honestly happy was about the last thing he'd thought to find when Bones had puked all over him, and he definitely hadn't ever thought he'd actually seriously think the words happily ever after without puking himself, much less mean them. But he did, and he had, and to his own shock he wanted it all, wanted the official bells and whistles, wanted the entire universe to know he was Bones', and Bones was his.
It had just taken awhile to work up the courage. The ring had been hidden in his drawer for weeks now as he fumbled with idea after idea, running them by the long-suffering Spock--who'd been compelled to listen by Uhura, who'd softened dramatically when it came to Jim and was having the time of her life listening to him panic--but he'd had enough. It was time.
He slipped the ring into his pocket and headed out the door. His and Bones' relationship was about as badly concealed as Spock and Uhura's, so nobody had batted an eye when he'd asked Yeoman Rand to have a special meal fixed and one of the small rec rooms reserved for the night. He was pretty damn sure he'd seen money pass between her and a smirking Chris Chapel, but he wasn't going there either.
He beat Bones to the rec room handily and spent a few minutes admiring the place. The table was before the view port, but strategically arranged so Bones could sit with his back to it if he wanted, and Jim could ogle his lover and the stars to his heart's content. Good deal. The flowers were a nice touch, and one he was hopefully not allergic to, and the candles told him Nyota had added her blessing because unless he was seriously mistaken she'd raided them from Spock's meditation collection. Two covered dishes sat before the places of honor, and Nyota had even drummed up a bottle of champagne, or something damn near close which rested in a bucket of ice.
His crew kicked major league ass, Jim mused proudly.
The door whooshed open before he could work himself into more of a panic than he already was and Bones walked in. One look at him stole Jim's breath; Bones had dressed down into those worn jeans that hugged his ass and a t-shirt. It was Jim's favorite outfit and the bastard knew it.
"Wow," he said honestly, and suddenly the dramatic and possibly somewhat pompous scene he'd half-sketched in his head vanished and only the words remained as they spilled out. "Marry me."
Bones' smug smile vanished. "What?"
Whoops. Hadn't meant to do it quite like that--he'd planned it as traditional as it came, with Jim on one knee, ring offered as soft music played--but then again, he never had been all that conventional and maybe now wasn't the time to start after all. He was committed, there was no turning back and he didn't want to, so he gave the shy, open smile only Bones got to see.
"Marry me," he repeated quietly, letting his sincerity shine through.
"No," Bones blurted, and Jim blinked, lovely daydreams splintering around him. Wait, what?!
Convention dictated weeping, wailing, and much gnashing of teeth right about now, so it was a good thing he'd already tossed it out the window. The hurt was there, sure, but not the devastation he'd have expected because Jim knew Bones loved him, totally, completely and past all shred of common sense or sanity. And this didn't make sense.
"No?" he repeated, shock flashing into anger so quick even he was left reeling somewhere beneath it. "What do you mean, no? Why the hell not?"
"I--you--I--"
Jim was on a roll. "It's not that you don't give a shit or you'd never have fucked me in the first place," he said, scowling as he laid out his evidence. "It's damn well not that you don't think we're good together, or you wouldn't have accepted the CMO slot when I offered." Okay, so it'd been more of an assumption that he'd say yes on Jim's part than an actual offer that involved the option of saying no, but the point was valid and they both knew it. He bit his lip when Bone remained stricken and silent, old and savage insecurities flaring back into ugly life. "Is it me? You don't want to commit to someone as fucked up as I am? That's it, isn't it? I'm not good enough--"
"Dammit, Jim, I'm the one that's not good enough!"
Jim's jaw dropped. "Come again?" He was under no illusions; he'd been a mess of issues and insecurities when Pike had dared him into joining the Fleet--hell, someone who had his shit more together than Jim would never have turned his life on end because of a fucking dare. So he'd rubbed their noses in it by turning himself into the campus slut, living down to everyone's worst expectations and then some while kicking their collective academic ass--except Bones had never bought it. Even when Jim had confessed his deepest secrets Bones hadn't turned away. Even Tarsus, and the hitched confession of what he'd done to obtain food for himself and his kids hadn't changed Bones' opinion of him.
A pained half-smile curved that lush mouth and Jim's eyes narrowed because that look did not belong on Bones' face and it didn't make him happy to see it there. "C'mon, Jimmy. You're the youngest Captain in the Fleet and probably the single smartest person in Starfleet. You've pulled off the impossible more times than I can count; the Enterprise is breaking records for the new discoveries we've made and the treaties we've gotten signed, and it all boils down to you in the end of it." His smile twisted as he lifted his hands. "You're Starfleet's golden boy. I love you, kid, but sooner or later you're gonna get tired of me and I can't do a divorce again."
"...I don't think I've ever wanted to kick your ass this bad and that's saying something," Jim said after a stunned moment.
"I'm baring my soul here!"
"Bullshit," Jim decided finally. "Just--bullshit. Seriously?" He shook his head, arms folded across his chest. "Dude, I hacked your files before I assigned myself as your roommate, so don't pull the genius card with me, Mr. Mensa-at-eleven. And the crew's the one pulling off miracles in their respective fields, you included; my biggest contribution is getting the hell out of your way and letting you do it." He shook his head again, torn between disgust and incredulity.
"As for golden boy..." Time to play hardball, and it wasn't like Bones didn't already know his darkest secrets anyway. "A golden boy wouldn't have cowered under a bully's fists the way I did Frank's, or sold his body for food like I did on Tarsus, and let's not even get into the finer points of spending weeks kissing Kodos' ass to keep my ass intact."
"Jim," Bones warned, the low rumble that meant he was getting well and truly pissed, but Jim was already there.
"I didn't have a relationship, ever," he snapped back, planting his feet and standing his ground because he was right, dammit. "I had one night stands, a hell of a lot of them. Meaningless fucks one and all, and I never spent the night in someone else's bed, much less took them back to mine. I never told them I loved them, and I damn well didn't let them wrap themselves into every goddamn bit of my life and like it. You're it for me, you stubborn son of a bitch. God alone knows why, because you're bitter on the bad days and grouchy on the good, and you love your fucking hypos way too damn much, but that's the way of it. You or nothing." He glared at Bones. "So don't you dare tell me I'll get tired of you. I spent three fucking years fighting you, fighting us, with everything in me and here I am, letting you deeper into my life than I ever will anyone else. You want to say no, say no, but at least give me a valid reason for it."
And there came the hurt, washing away the lingering and bitter dregs of his righteous fury, so he turned away to stare blindly at the viewport, fighting the burning at his eyes. He hadn't cried since Tarsus and he damn well wasn't going to start now. Not over the snarky, hypo-happy coward who'd somehow become essential to his world.
"Jim." The voice was soft, accent thick and sweet, and it was full of aching misery. "I'm sorry. God, I'm sorry."
"I don't want sorry," Jim said thickly. But he didn't argue when strong arms wrapped around him and pulled him back into the slightly bigger frame behind him. "Do you really believe that?"
Warm breath gusted over his hair. "No. No, I don't."
Jim wasn't letting him off the hook quite that fast, even as the knot eased in his gut. "Then why'd you say it?"
"Because I'm a coward," was the soft answer, "and this I didn't see coming. Because I remember how bad it got, and how much I loved Jocelyn before we ended it, and God, I don't ever want to see that kind of hatred in the face of someone I loved again." His arms tightened. "Because I love you more than I ever could've loved her, and losing you would kill me."
Easier to lash out, then, and avoid the joy they could find to miss the risk of it going sour on them. Jim understood--Christ, he understood--but that didn't mean he was going to accept it. So he leaned back against his lover and watched the stars flash by as his mind worried at the problem. Well, he could always make a public declaration, but that would up the pressure on Bones and then somehow he'd suffer for it. Pissing off your CMO was very stupid, especially when the man shared your bed and he was a lighter sleeper than you were.
"Offer's open," he settled on, trying to sound casual and failing miserably if the way Bones' arms tightened again was any indication. "Let's leave it at that."
"No," Bones said after a long, thoughtful pause. "No, I don't think we can do that. Status quo isn't gonna cut it anymore."
Author:
vlbuehle Fandom: Star Trek Reboot
Pairing: Kirk/Bones
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: Not mine, and I make no money off this, dammit. Life would be so much happier if I did.
Prompt: Bones and Kirk are in a serious relationship. It gets to the point where Kirk is comfortable enough to propose to Bones (however anon wishes, private or public), but Bones can't bring himself to say yes. When Kirk asks Bones why, he says that he's afraid Kirk will get tired of him and want a divorce one day, something Bones doesn't want to go through ever again. Kirk does his best to show how much Bones really means to him (again, anon's choice how). Sex is fine, but so is a meaningful bout of dialouge and some kissing.
A/N: For
cymbala ; hopefully this cheers you up a touch.James T. Kirk stared down at the small box in his drawer--unoriginal, yes, but traditional and at this point he'd take tradition and any luck it might bring. He didn't think Bones would say no, not really; they'd gone through too damn much, and he was pretty sure that if Bones had cared enough to take a risk on the fucked up jackass he'd been, he wasn't going to balk now. Besides, Bones was one of the few people Jim knew who actually believed in the shiny visions of white picket fences and happily ever after. Jim, now, he was a hard nosed realist who'd lost his belief in pretty fairy tales the first time Frank's fists had found his cowering frame. Any lingering belief had died on Tarsus IV--and then he'd met Bones. Bitter, snarky, perpetually cranky Bones who thought hyposprays were instruments of punishment and wielded them accordingly. And somehow along the way Jim had actually found his happily ever after: he had the best crew in the 'verse, he had his beautiful lady, and most importantly of all, he had Bones.
Go figure. Being honestly happy was about the last thing he'd thought to find when Bones had puked all over him, and he definitely hadn't ever thought he'd actually seriously think the words happily ever after without puking himself, much less mean them. But he did, and he had, and to his own shock he wanted it all, wanted the official bells and whistles, wanted the entire universe to know he was Bones', and Bones was his.
It had just taken awhile to work up the courage. The ring had been hidden in his drawer for weeks now as he fumbled with idea after idea, running them by the long-suffering Spock--who'd been compelled to listen by Uhura, who'd softened dramatically when it came to Jim and was having the time of her life listening to him panic--but he'd had enough. It was time.
He slipped the ring into his pocket and headed out the door. His and Bones' relationship was about as badly concealed as Spock and Uhura's, so nobody had batted an eye when he'd asked Yeoman Rand to have a special meal fixed and one of the small rec rooms reserved for the night. He was pretty damn sure he'd seen money pass between her and a smirking Chris Chapel, but he wasn't going there either.
He beat Bones to the rec room handily and spent a few minutes admiring the place. The table was before the view port, but strategically arranged so Bones could sit with his back to it if he wanted, and Jim could ogle his lover and the stars to his heart's content. Good deal. The flowers were a nice touch, and one he was hopefully not allergic to, and the candles told him Nyota had added her blessing because unless he was seriously mistaken she'd raided them from Spock's meditation collection. Two covered dishes sat before the places of honor, and Nyota had even drummed up a bottle of champagne, or something damn near close which rested in a bucket of ice.
His crew kicked major league ass, Jim mused proudly.
The door whooshed open before he could work himself into more of a panic than he already was and Bones walked in. One look at him stole Jim's breath; Bones had dressed down into those worn jeans that hugged his ass and a t-shirt. It was Jim's favorite outfit and the bastard knew it.
"Wow," he said honestly, and suddenly the dramatic and possibly somewhat pompous scene he'd half-sketched in his head vanished and only the words remained as they spilled out. "Marry me."
Bones' smug smile vanished. "What?"
Whoops. Hadn't meant to do it quite like that--he'd planned it as traditional as it came, with Jim on one knee, ring offered as soft music played--but then again, he never had been all that conventional and maybe now wasn't the time to start after all. He was committed, there was no turning back and he didn't want to, so he gave the shy, open smile only Bones got to see.
"Marry me," he repeated quietly, letting his sincerity shine through.
"No," Bones blurted, and Jim blinked, lovely daydreams splintering around him. Wait, what?!
Convention dictated weeping, wailing, and much gnashing of teeth right about now, so it was a good thing he'd already tossed it out the window. The hurt was there, sure, but not the devastation he'd have expected because Jim knew Bones loved him, totally, completely and past all shred of common sense or sanity. And this didn't make sense.
"No?" he repeated, shock flashing into anger so quick even he was left reeling somewhere beneath it. "What do you mean, no? Why the hell not?"
"I--you--I--"
Jim was on a roll. "It's not that you don't give a shit or you'd never have fucked me in the first place," he said, scowling as he laid out his evidence. "It's damn well not that you don't think we're good together, or you wouldn't have accepted the CMO slot when I offered." Okay, so it'd been more of an assumption that he'd say yes on Jim's part than an actual offer that involved the option of saying no, but the point was valid and they both knew it. He bit his lip when Bone remained stricken and silent, old and savage insecurities flaring back into ugly life. "Is it me? You don't want to commit to someone as fucked up as I am? That's it, isn't it? I'm not good enough--"
"Dammit, Jim, I'm the one that's not good enough!"
Jim's jaw dropped. "Come again?" He was under no illusions; he'd been a mess of issues and insecurities when Pike had dared him into joining the Fleet--hell, someone who had his shit more together than Jim would never have turned his life on end because of a fucking dare. So he'd rubbed their noses in it by turning himself into the campus slut, living down to everyone's worst expectations and then some while kicking their collective academic ass--except Bones had never bought it. Even when Jim had confessed his deepest secrets Bones hadn't turned away. Even Tarsus, and the hitched confession of what he'd done to obtain food for himself and his kids hadn't changed Bones' opinion of him.
A pained half-smile curved that lush mouth and Jim's eyes narrowed because that look did not belong on Bones' face and it didn't make him happy to see it there. "C'mon, Jimmy. You're the youngest Captain in the Fleet and probably the single smartest person in Starfleet. You've pulled off the impossible more times than I can count; the Enterprise is breaking records for the new discoveries we've made and the treaties we've gotten signed, and it all boils down to you in the end of it." His smile twisted as he lifted his hands. "You're Starfleet's golden boy. I love you, kid, but sooner or later you're gonna get tired of me and I can't do a divorce again."
"...I don't think I've ever wanted to kick your ass this bad and that's saying something," Jim said after a stunned moment.
"I'm baring my soul here!"
"Bullshit," Jim decided finally. "Just--bullshit. Seriously?" He shook his head, arms folded across his chest. "Dude, I hacked your files before I assigned myself as your roommate, so don't pull the genius card with me, Mr. Mensa-at-eleven. And the crew's the one pulling off miracles in their respective fields, you included; my biggest contribution is getting the hell out of your way and letting you do it." He shook his head again, torn between disgust and incredulity.
"As for golden boy..." Time to play hardball, and it wasn't like Bones didn't already know his darkest secrets anyway. "A golden boy wouldn't have cowered under a bully's fists the way I did Frank's, or sold his body for food like I did on Tarsus, and let's not even get into the finer points of spending weeks kissing Kodos' ass to keep my ass intact."
"Jim," Bones warned, the low rumble that meant he was getting well and truly pissed, but Jim was already there.
"I didn't have a relationship, ever," he snapped back, planting his feet and standing his ground because he was right, dammit. "I had one night stands, a hell of a lot of them. Meaningless fucks one and all, and I never spent the night in someone else's bed, much less took them back to mine. I never told them I loved them, and I damn well didn't let them wrap themselves into every goddamn bit of my life and like it. You're it for me, you stubborn son of a bitch. God alone knows why, because you're bitter on the bad days and grouchy on the good, and you love your fucking hypos way too damn much, but that's the way of it. You or nothing." He glared at Bones. "So don't you dare tell me I'll get tired of you. I spent three fucking years fighting you, fighting us, with everything in me and here I am, letting you deeper into my life than I ever will anyone else. You want to say no, say no, but at least give me a valid reason for it."
And there came the hurt, washing away the lingering and bitter dregs of his righteous fury, so he turned away to stare blindly at the viewport, fighting the burning at his eyes. He hadn't cried since Tarsus and he damn well wasn't going to start now. Not over the snarky, hypo-happy coward who'd somehow become essential to his world.
"Jim." The voice was soft, accent thick and sweet, and it was full of aching misery. "I'm sorry. God, I'm sorry."
"I don't want sorry," Jim said thickly. But he didn't argue when strong arms wrapped around him and pulled him back into the slightly bigger frame behind him. "Do you really believe that?"
Warm breath gusted over his hair. "No. No, I don't."
Jim wasn't letting him off the hook quite that fast, even as the knot eased in his gut. "Then why'd you say it?"
"Because I'm a coward," was the soft answer, "and this I didn't see coming. Because I remember how bad it got, and how much I loved Jocelyn before we ended it, and God, I don't ever want to see that kind of hatred in the face of someone I loved again." His arms tightened. "Because I love you more than I ever could've loved her, and losing you would kill me."
Easier to lash out, then, and avoid the joy they could find to miss the risk of it going sour on them. Jim understood--Christ, he understood--but that didn't mean he was going to accept it. So he leaned back against his lover and watched the stars flash by as his mind worried at the problem. Well, he could always make a public declaration, but that would up the pressure on Bones and then somehow he'd suffer for it. Pissing off your CMO was very stupid, especially when the man shared your bed and he was a lighter sleeper than you were.
"Offer's open," he settled on, trying to sound casual and failing miserably if the way Bones' arms tightened again was any indication. "Let's leave it at that."
"No," Bones said after a long, thoughtful pause. "No, I don't think we can do that. Status quo isn't gonna cut it anymore."
Jim squirmed around, eyes narrowing again. Not putting undue pressure on Bones was one thing, but letting him walk away from them was something else entirely. "Bones," he warned through clenched teeth, and a mischievous grin was his only warning before warm lips claimed his, stealing his breath and the words he'd been about to spit out with it.
"Bones," he protested when he was released to suck in a greedy breath of air, and the flash of laughter in hazel eyes wasn't quite enough for him to avoid the next kiss--not that he was trying all that hard right now. He groaned a weak argument into the kiss, and a hot tongue swept into his mouth, staking a claim and swirling the words away to leave Jim panting and dazed with the usual wash of heat and hunger that Bones inspired.
"Yes," Bones whispered against his mouth, and it took Jim a shamefully long moment to remember what Bones was saying, and why it really was more important than another one of those glorious kisses.
"Yes? You don't have to," he backpedaled, gaze still glued to kiss-darkened lips. "I mean it, Bones. Offer's open, maybe you should think it over before you say yes."
Bones eyed him with a combination of annoyance and amusement. "You're not gonna let this slide, are you?"
"I love you," Jim informed him. "I'd rather wait and have you be sure. Which means we have to wait."
Bones rolled his eyes and pulled away, ignoring Jim's slightly dazed squawk of protest as he strode to the comm, fixing Jim under a steady gaze as he keyed the shipwide intercomm.
"All right, listen up," he drawled. "The Captain just asked me to marry him and I said yes. You're my witnesses, and no, Nyota and Chapel, I don't care what we do for the wedding, that's in your capable hands. We're both off duty and if you interrupt us, I'll personally see to it you regret it. Yes, you're all invited, and you can congratulate us in the morning. McCoy out."
Jim gaped at him, stunned blue eyes darting from the comm to Bones and back against before he cleared his throat, dazed and dazzled by the triumphant smirk on Bones' face.
"Guess you're stuck with me now, kid." Bones sounded as smug as he looked, and Jim was suddenly giddy with joy. Bones had said yes, they were engaged, and he was across the room in two strides to claim his lover's mouth in his own fiercely possessive kiss. His now, all his, because Bones had said yes.
"Mine," he purred against his fiance's smirking lips.
Bones laughed. "Yours, Jim. God help us both."
FINIS
